Coming to the decision to divorce was a tough choice for you and your spouse. You wanted to make it work for the kids, but it’s clear that’s not possible anymore.
The good news is that by approaching your divorce in the right way, it doesn’t have to have a lasting, negative impact on your children’s lives. There are things you can do to help be the best co-parents possible.
Being honest with your children
If your kids are young, you may be tempted to avoid the divorce conversation and simply tell them that your spouse is moving away. But your children deserve the truth. However, that doesn’t mean they need the whole truth. Keeping it simple and letting them know you will no longer be married but you still love them is the first step. Then it’s beneficial to reassure them that your split is not because of them.
Having adults that get along in their lives
You and your spouse might not be getting along. However, it’s important to consider the consequences of letting your children see you argue. Making the decision to co-parent peacefully will help your children adjust to your divorce. As the adults in your children’s lives, setting an amicable and stable example will help your children flourish.
Managing custody exchanges
You may not be interested in spending quality time with your spouse anymore. But since you have young kids, you may have to see your spouse often for custody exchanges. You might still be resentful of your spouse. By meeting in a public place, you may be less inclined to get into an argument.
You may also want to arrange the exchanges so you don’t have to talk to your spouse at all. This could be the best scenario for everyone, especially if you’re not on great terms. By conducting the custody exchanges with your car stopping near your spouse’s car to pick up the kids, you’re decreasing the likelihood of a heated exchange that could distress your children.
Working together as co-parents can seem daunting when there’s still animosity between the two of you. But putting on a united front for the kids will greatly benefit them down the line.
