Divorce is a difficult time for the couple and the family. In many cases, children suffer from their parents divorcing. In other cases, it is in their best interest for their parents to divorce. Regardless, divorce shakes up the family dynamic and can cause instability for the entire family.
Consistency and routines
Children thrive on stability and routine, which is why it is critical to create some sort of routine for them, even during the divorce process and certainly after. While some parents choose to deal with child custody in court, others choose to co-parent together for the wellbeing of their children.
Co-parenting is an effective option for parents who wish to continue raising their children together and try to minimize, as much as possible, the damage that comes from breaking up with family. However, there are certain important things that co-parents must be aware of in order for this arrangement to work.
Do not speak ill of your child’s other parent to your child
Everyone understands that divorce is a tough time for adults, and negative emotions are an expected part of the process. However, it is critical for the adults to have their own support systems and to leave the children out of the chaos involved in the divorce. Speaking ill of your child’s other parent harms your child and their relationship with their other parent.
Avoid shutting down lines of communication
Communication is key in all relationships. In co-parenting it is critical because if parents do not communicate about their children and even about how the arrangement is working for them, it can lead to problems later on. Keeping the lines of communication open and adopting an honest, vulnerable attitude is the best way to ensure this arrangement works.
Try, as much as possible, not to be inflexible
It is understandable for parents to have their own lives after a divorce and to expect to create their own routines, which may involve having a set schedule to see the children. However, life never goes according to plan, and it is critical to leave room for flexibility and understanding of the other parent and their life, too.
Co-parenting is challenging but provides countless benefits to the children and the relationship between the child and their parents. While you may encounter problems along the way, do not give up and know that most problems can be solved with patience and willingness to work things out.